I’ve lost count of how many women—clients, colleagues, and friends—have whispered some version of the same confession: "I don’t even know who I am anymore."
These aren’t slackers. These are powerhouses.
They’re CEOs of their businesses or their homes. They’re boss mamas of their lives.
They’re super moms and wonder women who get things done—until one day, they realize they’ve been so busy holding everything together for everyone else that they’ve let themselves slip through the cracks.
But by the time they try to fix it, they’re exhausted, burned out and depleted. And in that state, doing personal development or even doing self-care feels like one more thing on the list.
In fact, in the personal development world, self-reflection, connection and self-care are often referred to as “doing the work.”
The inner work.
The mindset work.
The shadow work.
And that’s why people put it off.
The last thing you want when you’re already burned out is more work–one more thing on the to-do list or something you need to pencil in between client calls, soccer practice, and that never-ending email inbox.
When you're already drowning in to-dos, one more thing—even if it’s for you—feels impossible.
The Cost of Putting Yourself Last
But here’s the truth: ignoring burnout doesn’t make the problem go away.
When burnout starts, it builds. That constant frustration. The exhaustion that no amount of sleep can fix. The growing resentment every time someone asks you for one more thing. That’s what happens when you go too long without checking in with yourself.
Getting out of alignment with life doesn’t happen overnight. It starts small, but spreads like a virus. And before you know it, you wake up one morning feeling like a stranger in your own life.
When that happens, you don’t need more work.
You need more fun. More life. More zsush. More you.
It’s Not About More Work—It’s About More You
The problem when burnout hit me what that I couldn’t find it.
No matter how many girls’ nights out or massages I got, it didn’t get to the root of the problem. I didn’t just need to get out for the sake of getting out. And I didn’t need another self-help book or podcast.
I needed to reconnect with myself doing something fun–something that made me feel like me again.
So when I couldn’t find it, I created it.
What I found was that personal development doesn’t have to be a full-time job. You don’t need to journal for hours or do an expensive, months long Eat-Pray-Love retreat (unless you want to—then, by all means, book the flight).
But what you do need is connection with yourself. Not in a “fix yourself” kind of way—but in a “bring yourself back into the picture” kind of way.
You don’t need to overhaul your life overnight. You don’t need to add more to your plate. You just need to start bringing yourself back into the equation.
Because when you stop waiting for the perfect time to reconnect with yourself and start weaving it into the life you already have, you don’t just get your spark back.
You get you back.
Make Soul Work Simple–And Fun!
My two core beliefs are that:
Personal development doesn’t have to be time-consuming.
Personal development can actually be fun.
That’s why I started approaching personal development differently. As a busy go-getter myself, I found that quick check-ins don’t have to take over your day, but doing them keeps you from losing yourself in the shuffle. It’s small shifts, daily moments, and simple habits that make all the difference.
Personal Development Should Feel Good
And if it feels like a chore? You’re doing it wrong.
That’s why I love blending personal growth with the things that bring joy—style, energy, self-expression. It’s about finding ways to reconnect with yourself that don’t feel like work.
Because when something lights you up, when it feels fun, it sticks. That’s when real transformation happens.
Everything in life can become a spiritual practice, from slowly savoring a sip of your favorite hot chocolate or cappuccino to letting loose and feeling free on the dance floor. Driving in traffic can become a spiritual practice when you let yourself daydream, meditate (with your eyes open–of course), or listen to music or books that speak to you.
Personal Development Isn’t an Event. It’s Life.
When you realize that personal development and self-connection doesn’t have to be a scheduled event, but a natural part of life, it stops being work.
You don’t have to find a set time or a specific location to connect with yourself.
I tell my clients all the time: Five minutes a day is enough.
Five minutes to check in with yourself. Five minutes to recalibrate. Five minutes to ask: What do I need today?
When you turn daily tasks like cooking, dressing, or eating into part of your self-care or personal development routine, it makes those connections a simple, consistent part of life–and keeps you from running off the rails.
How to Start Now
So instead of waiting for a “perfect” moment to work on yourself, make it simple and achievable.
Here’s how:
Commit to giving yourself just a few minutes a day – Whether it’s a mindful moment, a sip of coffee, or just asking yourself what you need, these small, consistent moments are enough to reconnect with yourself–and appreciate yourself daily.
Turn ordinary tasks into opportunities for self-care – Reframe everyday tasks like eating or getting dressed as part of your personal development. Choose clothes that empower you, prepare a meal that fuels you, or take a moment to breathe while you wait in line at the grocery store.
Do what lights you up – Reconnect with the things that bring you joy. Whether it’s dancing or simply daydreaming, choose activities that fill you up instead of drain you. Do them in the shower, the kitchen, or in your head while you drive. Let yourself feel alive.
When you stop treating personal development like something that requires a huge time commitment, you’ll see the change.
You don’t need to wait for the perfect time to reconnect with yourself. Make it a daily habit.
Those moments add up. When you’re connected and aligned with yourself, you feel energized, focused, and, most importantly—like you again.
It’s time to reclaim yourself, one small, joyful step at a time.
You’re worth it.
~Your Real Life Fairy Godmother™
Ways We Can Help
If you’re ready to dive deeper into your personal development and want a little guidance along the way, I’ve got you. Whether you’re craving a bit of pampered personal growth or looking for simple soul work that feels as good as it is transformative, we’ve got options for you.
Check out our Signature Soul Style™ Experience, where personal development and style meet, or take a look at the Unlock Your IT Factor™ personal development course to align, recharge, and show up powerfully.
Because you deserve to show up as the best version of yourself—and have fun doing it!
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