It’s January. The start of a new year.
That time of year everyone’s talking about setting resolutions—losing weight, hitting the gym, eating cleaner, waking up at 5 AM. Even though most New Year’s resolutions don’t work.
We all know it–there’s plenty of talk about it. Yet we all continue to start the new year making promises that this year is going to be different. We’re going to crush it. We’ve got a vision.
But by February, we’re drowning and beating ourselves up because our resolutions have become one more thing we dread on our never-ending to-do lists.
For all the go-getters and high achievers out there, you’re already stretched thin. So when you inevitably slip up or can’t keep up with your resolution, it feels like you’re failing. Again. Guilt sets in and you feel like you’ve let yourself down. Again.
And that’s the problem with resolutions. If you’re already running on empty, resolutions can burn you out even faster.
But what if we threw out the resolutions altogether and focused on something more sustainable—something that feels less like a “should” and more of a “want”?
Enter: Authentic alignment.
What’s the Difference Between a Resolution and Authentic Alignment?
Here’s the truth about why most resolutions don’t work: resolutions are often rooted in shoulds—things you think you need to do because they’re expected of you. They’re focused on symptoms–the external behaviors that are actually rooted in a deeper issue that really needs to be addressed: living a life that’s not aligned with our authentic truth.
Authentic alignment is different. It’s about getting crystal clear on what you actually want—not what everyone else is doing or what you think is “right.” It’s about creating goals that feel aligned with your life, your values, and your actual desires. It’s not about changing who you are but in becoming more aligned with what IS right for you–what works for you and what energizes rather than depletes you.
It’s not a goal. It’s not a habit.
It’s alignment.
Why Resolutions Fail (And Why They’re Just One More Thing On Your Plate)
Here’s why resolutions fail—especially when you’re already juggling everything else:
They’re Just One More Thing To Do
Your plate is already full. You’ve got a career, kids, a household to manage, and a social life (sort of). And then comes the New Year, so you assess everything else that you “should” be doing but haven’t had time for. A New Year’s resolution can end up being one more thing on your never-ending lis, and that pressure sets you up for failure. It drains your energy instead of fueling you.
They’re Based on “Shoulds” and Not What You Really Want
Resolutions are often driven by external pressures. You’re supposed to be healthier, more productive, or more disciplined. If you’re setting your resolutions by comparing yourself to what others are doing, your resolutions can be more of a set up than a motivation. When your goals aren’t aligned with what you actually want, they’re harder to stick to.
They Rely on Willpower (Which Runs Out Fast)Willpower is like a battery—it runs out. Once your battery’s drained, so is your motivation to stick to those goals. If you set a goal that isn’t aligned with who you are, what you really want and need at this moment in your life, or is based on a determination to do what other people seem to do effortlessly, willpower won’t get you through–it will burn you out.
So, Why Does Authentic Alignment Actually Work?
If you’re ready for something that actually feels good and sticks, authentic alignment is the key. Here’s why. As opposed to brute force, grit, and determination, authentic alignment comes naturally. It feels like coming home to yourself and fuels you rather than drained you.
Authentic alignment works because
It’s Sustainable: Unlike resolutions that fade by February, authentic alignment is rooted in who you really are. It’s not about forcing yourself to fit into someone else’s mold—it’s about designing goals that resonate with you.
It’s Not Another “To-Do”: Authentic alignment isn’t a chore—it’s a lifestyle shift. It’s about making choices that feel right for you, not adding more tasks to your to-do list. It’s usually more about saying “no” to things that are out of alignment with who you are rather than adding more “shoulds” onto your list.
It’s About Self-Compassion, Not Perfection: When you set goals based on your truth, you’re not focused on “checking boxes.” You’re focused on your journey. Authentic alignment is forgiving, not demanding. It’s about what feels good for you, not what you think you “should” do to please others.
So, How Do You Get Authentically Aligned?
If you’re tired of setting resolutions that leave you feeling guilty and burnt out, it’s time to make a shift. Here’s how to start:
Forget the “Shoulds” and Tune Into What You Really Want
Forget about the pressures of what you “should” be doing this year. What would make you feel alive? What are the goals that actually excite you? You’ll know it’s right for you when it clicks.
Identify the Things That Drain You
Take a minute to look at your life. What’s sucking your energy? Your job? Your schedule? The constant pressure to be everything to everyone? When you can pinpoint what’s draining you, you can clear space for the things that bring you joy and fulfillment.
Focus on Becoming, Not Just Achieving
Instead of setting a goal to “lose 10 pounds,” focus on becoming someone who is healthier, who feels good in their body and about their body. Someone who feels good eating what their bodies are telling them they want. When your goals are grounded in who you really are and being more aligned with your core values, the more sustainable your goals will be.
The Bottom Line
This year, let’s ditch the resolution grind. No more guilt trips for not sticking to some arbitrary goal. Instead, focus on what feels aligned with who you are right now—no pressure, no shoulds. Just you, showing up for yourself in the most authentic way possible. Because that’s how you build momentum that lasts.
You deserve a year where your goals work for you, not against you. You’re worth it!
~Your Real Life Fairy Godmother™
Need help getting authentically aligned? Check out our Unlock Your IT Factor™ digital course designed for busy people on the go. Learn the tools to get authentically aligned and stay authentically aligned in just 5 minutes a Day, 5 days a week: https://www.emergencelifecoaching.com/unlockyouritfactor
תגובות